Tag: Adolescence

Categories
Addiction

America’s #1 Health Problem

A new CASA (The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse) report on adolescent substance abuse hit the wires today. Their findings were disheartening, stating, “Adolescent substance abuse is America’s #1 health problem.” The report studied smoking, drinking, the misuse of prescription drugs, and illicit drugs. CASA also delved into the science of addiction itself, identifying it as a “complex brain disease with origins in adolescence,” and going on to document how “adolescence is the critical period for the initiation of substance use.” They not only looked at the drugs being used or the age of the user, but at American culture itself—for example, the way the media romanticizes the use of alcohol in its advertising.

Here are some highlights from their report:

  • 90 percent of Americans who meet the medical criteria for addiction started smoking, drinking, or using other drugs before age 18.
  • 1 in 4 Americans who began using any addictive substance before age 18 developed an addiction, compared to 1 in 25 Americans who started using at age 21 or older.
  • 75 percent of all high school students have used addictive substances including tobacco, alcohol, marijuana or cocaine; 1 in 5 of them meet the medical criteria for addiction.
  • 46 percent of all high school students currently use addictive substances; 1 in 3 of them meet the medical criteria for addiction

The ads we see plastered on enormous billboards on the busiest corners in Los Angeles are there to intrigue us. They aren’t just selling a beer, or some whiskey, they’re selling a lifestyle: one that’s full of handsome men and gorgeous women, all ready and willing to party at will. Life looks perfect in those ads, but we all know it is anything but perfect. It sure can seem alluring, though, particularly when we’re young, rebellious, and feeling the pressures of growing up and being “cool.” The intrigue is also directly fueled by the current generation’s perpetually perceived boredom, which stems from our culture of instant gratification. In our current climate, drugs and alcohol are culturally accepted: we have medical marijuana and a pill for every problem.

Our brains are vulnerable in adolescence and at the height of development. In fact, they aren’t fully developed until we’re around 25! As we spoke about in our recent post, once we begin indulging in the use of mind-altering substances, we are essentially performing science experiments on ourselves.

Susan Foster, senior investigator of the study, notes: “By recognizing this as a health problem and respondingto it, we can actually make the difference by improving the life prospects ofteens and saving costs in society.”  This brings us back to what I always say, get involved and start talking to your kids! Teens are under an inordinate amount of pressure: school, peers, hormones, et cetera. At some point, we have to start looking at how those we love are actually managing such an incredible stress load. I once heard a therapist say, “Little people, little problems; big people, big problems.” She was specifically talking about the value in addressing issues when they begin rather than waiting things explode. When we’re trying to preserve and heal family dynamics, it’s far less challenging to deal with an angry 8-year-old than a drug-addicted teen.

Related articles:

Study: Drug Addiction Among Teens On The Rise (newyork.cbslocal.com)

Addiction Starts Early in American Society, Report Finds(nlm.nih.gov)

Categories
Addiction Adolescence Mental Health

Doctor, Doctor, Gimme the News

Image by WhatDaveSees via Flickr

Is your teen playing doctor? Surely, this is an appropriate question for parents of adolescents who are concerned about teens entering a sexually intimate relationship before he or she is ready.

Unfortunately, this is not what I’m addressing. John Lieberman, our Director of Operations sees quite a bit of this and is concerned that “adolescents are literally playing doctor in the worst way, taking both prescribed and over-the-counter medications to treat perceived illnesses and issues.” They are reading information on the Internet, getting advice from peers as to what medications they should take, and they’re often mixing and matching drugs while they’re at it. While some of these Internet sites have some valuable information regarding symptom checks and corresponding information about illnesses, they also present a danger. Any time we look at something from the perception of a layperson, we risk finding and relating to symptoms within the descriptions of many illnesses. That’s what real doctors are for: differentiating reality from the natural misinterpretation from those of us lacking the vital MD title. Pharmaceutical-related overdoses have increased, proving the increasing danger in this behavior, and spurning an all out war against the pharmaceutical industries.

Drugs like Vicodin, Oxycontin, Percocet, and Demoral are all opium derivative drugs. This particular class of drug is highly addictive and can easily lead to an overdose. Xanax, Ativan, Klonopin, Soma, Lunesta and others are benzodiazepines. These, too, can create a physical addiction in a short period of time and in worse cases, cause death. Adderal, Ritalin, and Vyvance are amphetamines primarily used to treat ADHD and are subsequently very powerful drugs that can cause heart attack and stroke, particularly when used inappropriately. The latter are often traded amongst kids in an effort to get high, or even as an attempt to increase their focus at school.

Our kids are playing doctor with quite a varied array of drugs, and this does not take into account the rampant abuse of illicit drugs or alcohol. According to John Lieberman, “Our teens are using very powerful psychoactive drugs during a time in their lives when they are emotionally vulnerable and when their brains are in a major stage of development.” According a 2010 statement by the APA:

“The brain’s frontal lobes, essential for functions such as emotional regulation, planning and organization, continue to develop through adolescence and young adulthood. At this stage, the brain is more vulnerable to the toxic and addictive actions of alcohol and other drugs.”

This isn’t just about playing doctor, kids are also doing chemistry experiments…with their own brains.

This blog was co-written by John Lieberman, our Director of Operations.

Additional links:

Causes of Increase in Opioid Deaths Probed

Be the Wall

Partnership for a Drug Free America

Categories
Mental Health Parenting Recovery Self-Care Transparency

Father’s Day

(Image via Wikipedia)
We’re coming up on Father’s Day, and for some, this is a wonderful opportunity to recognize their first hero, their first confidante, or their primary example of “the good guy.” For others, it might mean having to face someone whose trust was lost because of addiction. And for others, it may mean reconciling with the repercussions of not having such an important figure their lives.
I have the pleasure of watching my son and his evolving relationships with his dad and step-dad. I am fortunate to bear witness to their triumphs and struggles, wins and losses, laughter and tears. I understand the inherent value of a healthy, positive father-son relationship, and do all I can do encourage it. 
I was intrigued by this interesting article posted by the Georgia Psychological Association, where Dr. Williams writes about the varying stages of father-son relationships. He says boys often idolize their dads as children, “experience a period of discord” in their teens, begin to evolve as young adults, move into acceptance in their 30s-40s, and eventually “become a legacy of their father’s influence for better and worse” when they reach their 50s and beyond. Seeing my son step onto the path to maturation, I am keenly aware of the need to develop positive habits, some of which need to learned from his father(s). In his case, I am hopeful for a virtuous legacy.
The dynamic between dads and daughters is compelling: Some say girls grow up to marry a version of their dads, while others might carry the nomenclature of “Daddy’s Little Girl” well into their adulthood. There are those, too, who take on the mother figure when mom is absent and dad is left to raise the family on his own. Lastly, there are those whose fathers bailed out, leaving their daughters bereft of a solid, male figurehead. Clearly, things can get complicated. How we manage the complications and find ways to make them palatable is where our recovery work comes in.  As a woman whose relationship with my father is tenuous at best, the tools of my recovery have become invaluable. Learning to let go, learning not to take things personally, learning to remove the ego from the pain of abandonment, and learning to accept that I am sufficient, have become essential. Without these factors, I risk drowning in emotion, a perilous position for any alcoholic/addict.
So, regardless of your relationship with your dad, be it adoring or nebulous, being in recovery gives us the opportunity to develop some kindness and compassion and teaches us how to put it all to good use. (This may actually mean setting a boundary and showing compassion to yourself in some cases!). As we work the steps, we are given the opportunity to change our unskillful behaviors through taking action. After inventories, which require inward reflections, we begin to change our viewpoint and begin taking the appropriate actions toward making positive changes in our relationships with others. It’s the beginning of a lifelong process that teaches us to lesson our expectations, which ultimately increases our ability to accept things as they are.
May this this Father’s Day bring some healing to your hearts and lives. And may you celebrate with an open heart and a compassionate mind,  one breath at a time.
Categories
Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar Children and Teens

Bipolar disorder isn’t soley an issue for the adult population—it affects children and teens as well.
Bipolar disorder is a mental illness categorized by its behavioral and mental extremes. Often called “manic depression,” this illness is clearly defined by its moods. Typically recognized as the manic stage, the sufferer may be elated or intensely “up,” even hyper. The flip side of this is the depressive stage, identified by its extreme lows, deep sadness, physical ailments, and for some, suicidal ideation.
According to NIMH, several factors may contribute to this mental illness:
  • Genes, because the illness runs in families. Children with a parent or sibling with bipolar disorder are more likely to get the illness than other children.
  • Abnormal brain structure and brain function.
  • Anxiety disorders. Children with anxiety disorders are more likely to develop bipolar disorder.
Since the causes aren’t concretely defined, scientists continue to do research, seeking more definitive answers in hopes of finding viable solutions, including a possible means of prevention.

These mood episodes can last a week or even two and are heavy in their intensity.  NIMHhas provided a listof symptoms from the two phases of bipolar disorder. Keep in mind, these symptoms are determined by their intensity and are not to be confused with the natural ups and downs of childhood emotional development.

Children and teens having a manic episode may:
  • Feel very happy or act silly in a way that’s unusual
  • Have a very short temper
  • Talk really fast about a lot of different things
  • Have trouble sleeping but not feel tired
  • Have trouble staying focused
  • Talk and think about sex more often
  • Do risky things.
Children and teens having a depressive episode may:
  • Feel very sad
  • Complain about pain a lot, like stomachaches and headaches
  • Sleep too little or too much
  • Feel guilty and worthless
  • Eat too little or too much
  • Have little energy and no interest in fun activities
  • Think about death or suicide.
Bipolar disorder is difficult to diagnose in children because symptoms often mirror other issues, for example: ADHD, conduct disorder, or alcohol and drug abuse issues. Bipolar disorder can, however, occur alongside these other issues, so it’s important to see a professional skilled in recognizing the affectations of various mental health disorders. Treatment for bipolar disorder requires the use of medication, but because the effectiveness in children isn’t as well researched, it’s wise to take note that children may respond differently to medications than adults. NIMH recommends children and adolescents take the “fewest number and smallest amounts of medication possible to help their symptoms,” additionally noting the danger in stopping any medication without the advice of a physician.
Pay attention to any side effects, and immediately tell the treating physician if you recognize new behaviors. Remember: the treatment for bipolar disorder is based upon the effective treatment of adults, which typically applies the use of mood stabilizers like lithium and/or valproate to control symptoms of mania and act as a preventative to the recurrence of depressive episodes.  Still, treatment of children and adults is still being researched. At this time, “NIMH is attempting to fill the current gaps intreatment knowledge with carefully designed studies involving children andadolescents with bipolar disorder.”  Further, scientists continue to perform studies looking at different types of psychotherapy, which would support the pharmaceutical treatment used in children and teens.  
Please see below for links to additional information (note, I also used some of these as reference for this article.)
1: https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/bipolar-disorder-in-children-and-teens-easy-to-read/index.shtml
2:  https://psychcentral.com/disorders/bipolarchild.htm
3: https://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/mental_health/bipolar.html#
4: https://www.webmd.com/bipolar-disorder/tc/bipolar-disorder-in-childhood-and-adolescence-topic-overview
Categories
Sexuality

National Teen Pregnancy Prevention Month

It’s May. Do you know what that means? It’s National Teen Pregnancy Prevention Month!

There’s value in suggesting one can enjoy their teen years without the added stress of sexual relationships added to the mix, but that’s not always realistic. Adolescence means hormonal changes (puberty!), accelerated brain development, and of course a natural proclivity for recklessness.  Puberty is confusing: thoughts are scattered and often vacillate between sexual urges to feeling depressed and shut down; we are, by nature, unpredictable during this developmental period. But you know what? This is also normal!
So, it’s not only important to talk about pregnancy prevention, but also the emotional and physical states that tend to lead us toward getting pregnant in the first place. The pressure to fit in and do what everyone else SAYS they’re doing can be overwhelming. Adolescents are also prone to having a tight relationship with hyperbole when it comes to their sexuality.  Remember Jonah Hill’s character in Superbad and his exaggerated boastfulness about sex? Or how about the iconic scene in 16 Candles where The Geek borrows Samantha’s panties for 10 minutes so he can hold them up for his friends as proof of his sexual prowess? Anything to prove he’s not a virgin, right? Ironically,  statistics prove otherwise and frankly make The Geek look pretty average. In fact, “nearly 8 out of 10 guys say there is way too much pressure on them to have sex”!
Here are some things to think about before things get hot and heavy. Better to be preparedthan placed in a position to struggle with your own maturation in tandem with a child’s.

  • If you’re drunk or high, it’s hard to make good decisions about sex. Don’t do something you might regret or might not remember!
  • Did you know: Half of high-school teens haven’t had sex.
  • It’s OK to have friends without “benefits” — Sex ≠ love!
  • Think twice before pressing “send” on your phone or email. One third of teens say that those who share sexy images of themselves are “expected” to put out. Is that the impression you’d like to leave?
  • If you are going to have sex, use protection. Condoms are the only birth control method that can reduce your risk of getting HIV or STDs. Know your options.

Some statistics about teen pregnancy:

  • 3 out of 10 girls in the US get pregnant at least once before age 20.
  • Parenthood is the leading reason why teen girls drop out of school; less than half of teen mothers complete high school and fewer than 2% earn a college degree before age 30.
  • Having a baby won’t make him stay – 8 out of 10 fathers don’t marry the mother of their child.
  • More than half of all mothers on welfare had their first child as a teen.
  • The daughters of young, teen mothers are 3 times more likely to become teen mothers themselves.
  • The sons of teen mothers are twice as likely to end up in prison.

Have a plan. Educate yourself and start asking questions. Parents, school counselors, Planned Parenthood: those are all viable options. Also, if you aren’t comfortable having a direct conversation with your potential partner(s) about sex, you probably aren’t ready to have sex in the first place. Take some time and get informed!  And remember, it’s okay to say “No!”

References for this blog and additional information:
1. https://www.thenationalcampaign.org/national/pdf/2011/2011_ND_brochure.pdf
2: https://www.stayteen.org/teen-pregnancy
3. https://www.plannedparenthood.org

Categories
Addiction Alcoholism Recovery Self-Care

Love and Boundaries

What happens when someone you love relapses and decides not to get sober again?
Regardless of whether that person is a parent or a close friend, it’s a challenge, to say the least. In AA, we are told  “we simply do not stop drinking so long as we place dependence upon other people ahead of dependence on a higher power¹” This statement alone verifies the need to allay one’s reliance upon the static nature of the sick, and instead turn the focus on paving a new path toward healing.

In 1951, Al-Anon began using the steps, giving those married to and reared by the alcoholic, tools with which they could live by. One thing is key: Al-Anon and Alateen don’t focus or talk about the alcoholic; they instead focus on themselves and learn how they can lead a happier, freer life. Here, the lesson is not to fix the person we love, but rather how to live life fully and independent of their disease. That’s tough, especially when  our expectations have taken hold: “If only they get sober, then everything will be okay.” or  “I’m not the one with the problem, they are.” But when we place our focus on fixing someone else’s problems, obsess over their emotional health, and base our lives around their well-being, that IS a problem.

Alateen is a wonderful support for kids struggling with alcoholic/addict parents or siblings. When chaos is the norm, then Alateen provides tools for weathering the storm. As kids living with alcoholics and addicts know, reaffirming reality in their day-to-day lives is the norm; the steps and fellowship: however, help provide a healthy, non-threatening way to do that. At some point, we find that part of supporting someone else’s sobriety means allowing them to walk their own path, no matter how rocky that path may be. We can’t walk it for them. If that means that their sobriety is tenuous at best, then we have to learn how to step aside. I call it loving someone with boundaries. In other words, we can love you when you’re in your disease, but we won’t hold you up.

¹ BB Page 98 (Note: “God” was replaced with “higher power” in the post.)

 

Categories
Addiction Alcohol Alcoholism Holidays Mental Health Recovery

New Beginnings

Image via Wikipedia

It’s Passover, and you know what that means? It’s that time of year where it’s customary to drink four glasses of wine through dinner as part of the Passover story! It means giant family gatherings, with the myriad of wacky personalities. It also may mean some anxiety for the newcomer (or even someone with time, you never know!) For some, it’s this Passover week, for others, it might be the upcoming Easter Sunday. Either way, self-care is key. Ask for help if you need it, and have an exit plan–better to have one and not need it than to need it and not have it!

This particular holiday reminds me of my early introduction to alcohol. My family didn’t drink that often; holidays were the exception. Still, I have distinct memories of sitting at the family Passover table, with my thimble full of Manischewitz wine, thinking I was the coolest kid in the world. I remember the warmth in my belly, and the slight fuzz in my head (I would get sneaky and steal sips from other folk’s glasses). I remember thinking I was a part of the adult world, and a real part of my family. It was a childhood delusion, of course, but the memory stuck.

Wine has deep roots in some religions, for example, in Christianity it represents the blood of Christ, and in Judaism, the fruit of the vine. It’s an accepted, expected, ritualistic piece of the religious meal. But as we get sober and learn to participate in the rituals of our varying cultures, we must learn to make adjustments. No one wants to see you drunkenly opening the door for Elijah! We drink grape juice instead of wine, and we learn to adapt the rituals and meals to our sober, clean lives.

Passover is about freedom from slavery and tyranny; and like Easter, it’s reflective of Spring and new beginnings. What apropos likeness to our recovery! Here, we are offered an opportunity to begin to view our sobriety as freedom from the tyranny of drugs and alcohol. Our recovery is our new beginning and our new life. Remember what Chuck C. said: “You cannot think your way into a new way of acting, but you can act your way into a new way of thinking.” Have a safe, sober, and joyous holiday week.

Categories
Bullying Sexuality

Love Doesn’t Hurt

(Image by Tayrawr Fortune via Flickr)

Teen dating is rite of passage. It’s part the induction into young adulthood, and the ground on which we begin to build the foundations of having a healthy relationship. Unfortunately, “healthy” isn’t always part of the equation, and as we come to the end of February, National Teen Dating Violence Prevention and Awareness Month, I thought it apropos to talk about what happens if/when a relationship goes awry. As if navigating adolescence wasn’t hard enough as it is, right?
Domestic violence is an insidious beast. It’s not always obvious to outsiders and can often go undetected until it’s too late. There’s a huge element of shame associated with being on the receiving end, as well as an untenable fear of incurring further abuse. Truthfully, it’s another form of bullying, and a bully’s usual tactic is to threaten their victim with fatalistic consequences, ultimately forcing the victim to suffer in silence, isolate, and not ask for help.

Some signs that someone may be experiencing dating violence are:

    • Physical signs of injury
    • Truancy, dropping out of school
    • Failing grades
    • Indecision
    • Changes in mood or personality
    • Use of drugs/alcohol
    • Pregnancy
    • Emotional outbursts
    • Isolation

Signs that your dating partner may eventually become violent:

    • Extreme jealousy
    • Controlling behavior
    • Quick involvement
    • Unpredictable mood swings
    • Alcohol and drug use
    • Explosive anger
    • Isolates you from friends and family
    • Uses force during an argument
    • Shows hypersensitivity
    • Believes in rigid sex roles
    • Blames others for his problems or feelings
    • Cruel to animals or children
    • Verbally abusive
    • Abused former partners
    • Threatens violence

Because teens often romanticize intimate relationships (particularly this generation, which has grown up watching glorified, sexualized violence in television, film, and media), there is an inherent  belief among boys that their masculinity is defined by aggression, while girls often see their role as problem solver and passive. These attitudes fundamentally perpetuate the problem of gender inequality which so often leads to the abuse of power and the use of control in relationships.

If you are experiencing any facet of dating/domestic violence, please seek help. There are anonymous, 24-hour helplines available to you, your teachers and parents will help you, you just have to speak up. You don’t deserve to be abused. Love is respect, and it certainly shouldn’t hurt.

Related articles
Categories
Adolescence Bullying

Dating Violence: Where’s the R-E-S-P-E-C-T?

Domestic violence doesn’t play the race card, class card, or age card–it has no boundaries: it thrives on dominance and control. In teens, it’s referred to as dating violence, a type of intimate partner violence, wherein a partner is pinched, hit, shoved, or kicked; they are often shamed, called names, bullied, embarrassed with intent, and isolated from friends and family; they are sometimes forced to engage in non-consensual sex. When started early in one’s life, these relationships can lead to a pattern of abuse as they grow older. If intimacy is learned through violence and fear, then violence and fear become the normative behavior, making healthy interactions seem foreign and perhaps even uncomfortable. Sometimes the initial teasing and name-calling that occur are considered normal, but often times, they are just the opening act leading to more serious violence like battering and/or rape.

This is a serious issue, but sadly, teens don’t usually report dating violence for fear of what friends or family may think. The fact is, it’s happening with more and more frequency, and to more people than we care to admit. These statistics from the CDCspeak volumes:

  • 1 in 4 adolescents report verbal, physical, emotional, or sexual abuse from a dating partner each year
  • About 10% of students nationwide report being physically hurt by a boyfriend of girlfriend in the past 12 months

According to the US Department of Justice, “Females ages 16-24 are more vulnerable to intimate partner violence than any other age group,” and according to the Empower Program, sponsored by Liz Claiborne, “A majority of parents (54%) admit they’ve not spoken to their child about dating violence.” So, while this behavior is often recognized (and yet ignored) amongst teens, the parental knowledge base seems scanty at best. Parents are afraid to talk about it, and kids are afraid to go to their parents; that’s a double-negative detrimental to affecting change of any kind, now isn’t it! The CDC lists warning signs for someone at risk for using dating violence–recognizing these signs early may help stop the cycle of abuse before it can start:

  • Poor social skills;
  • Inability to manage anger and conflict;
  • Belief that using dating violence is acceptable;
  • Having more traditional beliefs about male and female roles;
  • Witnessing violence at home;
  • Alcohol use;
  • Having behavioral problems in other areas;
  • Having a friend involved in dating violence;
  • Witnessing violence in the community.

Other things we can do is foster positive, healthy relationships with our children, model loving behavior in the home, and talk about what’s going on with our kids or within the community regarding violence, even if it’s scary! Because if we don’t talk about it, our kids are ultimately at risk for trying to “fix” their problem with things like drugs and alcohol, and that’s just going to create another layer of dysfunctionality, opening more doors for despair to flourish.

Categories
Body Image Eating Disorders Mental Health Recovery

Help With My Eating Disorder

I began to address my eating disorder when I was in adolescent treatment in Malibu. It has been a very difficult journey and sometimes it has been very hard not to lapse into old behaviors. In the last year, I have really dedicated myself to staying committed to recovery and have recently seen a big change- I’ve gained weight! In the past, this would have destroyed me, but since I have been working so hard to get healthy, I feel pretty good about it. Mostly. Honestly, this week I had a bit of an emotional meltdown when I went to try on a bathing suit I hadn’t worn for three years. It didn’t fit. Later that night I went to put on a favorite summer dress. It didn’t fit. My jeans didn’t fit. Like, overnight my clothes stopped fitting. It’s one thing to talk about the work, to write about the work, to intellectualize the work- and an entirely different thing to actually have it happen. In my brain, I am very pleased to have some success in this very difficult area of my life. In my eating disorder’s brain, I am losing my mind. It’s horrifying. I feel like I shouldn’t be so upset, but of course I am. This old way of thinking has dominated my life for years and years. Of course I will grieve.
My sponsor and my best friend both suggested that I get rid of my old clothes. They will never fit me again as long as I am healthy. I took their advice and began to bag up my eating disorder clothes and cried the whole time. It was intensely symbolic for me to say goodbye to them, and to my eating disorder– to acknowledge that I’m not going to be that underweight again. That I’m going to stay healthy. I felt like I could almost hear my eating disorder yelling “Noooooo!” as if it was a villain being shoved off of a cliff in a movie. Sometimes those ceremonial gestures are important, like I’m showing myself what is really happening.
This week has been kind of heavy for me, but now that it’s over I feel a certain levity. I know that there is still a lot of work to do so that I don’t lapse in behavior. I have to power through this challenging time. It was hard to say goodbye, and I know that this is part of my grieving process. It may sound weird to grieve something that hurt me so much, but it was my greatest comfort for many years, and it’s scary to let go of it. I know that I have a lot of love and support around me, and that I don’t have to go through this alone. And hey, I get to go shopping.

Adolescent Eating Disorder Treatment In Malibu

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