While in recovery, I’ve learned how to talk about how I am feeling. I’ve learned all the tools, how to talk, and what to do. Sometimes even when I talk about how I feel, there is still something in me that needs to physically get out. When I was using I wouldn’t talk about anything. I would stuff down all my emotion with negative coping mechanisms. I would either use, cause chaos, or literally run away from problems. I didn’t know how to let go of the physical strain I was going through. Recovery has taught me healthy ways to physically let go of emotion. One of these ways is art therapy.
When I am in a depressing mood I will play my guitar and write a song. When I’m angry I’ll draw. When I’m bored or feeling sorry for myself I’ll make a collage or a card for someone. Art is the most expressive thing I know. It feels so good to be able to let everything just slide off me and into this creative emotion filled entity. I can just sit in my room for hours, expressing myself with art, getting lost in it all. By the time I finish, I realize that I hadn’t once thought about using drugs or alcohol. It gives me a sense of fulfillment. I had been able to work through the issue without feeling the need to resort to havoc.
Sometimes my best friend will come to my house and we will express ourselves with art together. It creates and environment where we can focus and talk about what is on our minds. It has helped me in recovery when just talking about what’s on my mind wouldn’t completely help. Today I make it a habit to do art. Everyday I make sure I am physically expressing myself with creativity. Whether it be poetry, music, sculpture, etc. I do it. Art has been a huge outlet for me and for others to help keep clean and sober.
