The effective treatment of adolescents with substance abuse and behavioral disorders requires an approach that includes attention to every aspect of a young person’s life. We see every individual as a whole being. In addition to fully understanding the emotional, developmental, physical, psychological, familial, social and cultural factors, there must be appropriate resources in place to address these issues.
As a father of a 10 year old, I know the time will come when my son will “need” a cell phone. What once was a convenience has now become a necessity. I’ll gladly pay his bill as long as he uses his phone wisely. If he goes over his minutes (which will be limited), he will have to pay the charges.
I bring this up because I have heard horror stories about kids abusing their cell phone privileges. In fact, many kids and adults as well, are addicted to phone messaging. The main culprit is text messaging. With texting you can send messages without talking, so you do not disturb anyone around you. People become addicted to this convenient way of communicating with their friends, and like all addictions, it ends up messing up their lives. Important responsibilities are traded for messaging. Bills go unpaid, appointments are missed, and one’s priorities become generally turned upside-down.
I recently heard of a teenager who racked up a $500.00 bill due to excessive texting. Besides the financial toll, texting can lead to tendonitis in the thumbs and fingers. Students use their phones to cheat on tests, and many lose sleep because they are up all night chatting with friends. Perhaps the scariest thing about texting is that it is causing the English language to deteriorate. Many teachers report that texting abbreviations and jargon are showing up in formal academic writing. I’m not against texting, but like most things, there has to be a limit. We can’t allow text messaging to be the downfall of civilization.
The thought has entered my mind that an addict might not be constantly thinking about drugs, but rather in a certain moment they feel that they cannot live without it. You see, everyone has that one thing that they are addicted to. Whether it is work, gambling, shopping, pornography, sports, women, or merely superstition that controls them, everybody has something that they feel they either can't or won't live without. Almost everyday someone goes through a moment in time where they are a slave to a certain will or desire. For me it has never been drugs, but that doesn't mean that I don't have an addict's mentality sometimes. True, these slaves of mine will probably never land me in jail, cost massive amounts of money, or end with me in a pine box, but they could cost me in moral values, hinder my walk with Christ, or even take up my time. I do believe that the problems that we have now are the problems that we will have in our 50's. For some reason, I have never seen being a drug addict as just a problem. It has always been a foreign language to me until now. Working with these kids has opened my eyes to the plain and simple fact that they just have a problem, the same as me, you and everyone else on this planet.
Celebrity rehab isnt only the first tv series to expose famous people and their drug abuse habits... it's the first show to exhibit a real rehab experience period. In some ways, this is a good thing that VH1 is doing. It shows that celebrities are getting sober, and it shows how real and hard this program is. Unlike Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan who have been to treatment time and time again and keep relapsing and faling into old behavior, these ceebrities seem like they have a real passion for geting sober and staying sober. The seem to want sobriety and seem to be doing for themselves, rather than for their image. Of course the process is difficult, and at times they seem as though they want to give up, but as a sober alcoholic and drug addict I remember those times too. We work through the pain, and come out victorious. Dr. Drew Pinksy (aka Dr. Drew from Loveline) has placed these celebrities at his facility in Pasadena and all clients have agreed to tape their recovery process for the world to see. This may serve as a inspiration to other addicts and alcoholics out there. If these celebrities can do it, in Hollywood no less, then for sure they can too!
I quit smoking cigarettes after inhaling them for 14 years. I miss them every day and I probably think of them every other minute at the moment. It is a challenge and one that I didn’t even anticipate making. One day I basically hit my bottom with cigarettes. My body felt like it was starting to shut down. I would get headaches everyday from smoking, which then made my body tense, which then gave me no motivation or oxygen circulation, which then the list goes on and on. The bottom line is, every part of my being was starting to get affected by this disease of addiction.
Working at a teen treatment center that deals with addiction has been a blessing for me. I am aware that any addiction has an underlying psychological motivation. For me, to let go of cigarettes is painful for it feels as if I am letting go of the love of my life. I understand this sounds silly and yet this is what the young adults at teen treatment centers with drug and alcohol addiction feel as well. It is strange. It is strange to love something so harmful towards us. It’s strange to be ok with poisoning ourselves for so long and then one day decide that it’s not ok to do that anymore. The thing is I would never stop smoking if my body could handle it. And yet as a responsible adult I have to be aware of the choices I make in life. I am not even angry that I have to stop, I am only extremely sad that I can no longer continue.
Often when new in al-anon, a twelve step program for friends and family members of alcoholics, mothers and fathers of alcoholics feel unable to relate to everyone sharing their stories about spouses. The concepts seem foreign and unable to apply to a parental relationship. Detachment is one of the concepts that parents balk most at. Thinking of “detaching” from their child seems unloving and irresponsible. Detachment is neither kind or unkind, it does not imply judgment. Detachment is simply separating ourselves from the undesirable effects of another person’s addiction. It is not letting ourselves get dragged every which way by the mere behaviors, or lack there of, of our loved one. It is setting healthy boundaries for ourselves so that we may begin to enjoy our lives regardless of the trial and tribulations that the alcoholic is going through. We try not to control or fix things that aren’t ours to fix. We didn’t cause the addiction, we can’t control the addiction and we certainly can’t cure it.
This does not necessarily mean physical detachment but it allows parents to pause, take a step back and observe the situation at hand realistically and objectively. We can still love the person without liking the behavior. For most of us dealing with an alcoholic in our lives is too much for us to handle that is why we look to al-anon Detachment allows us to let go of our obsession with the alcoholic’s behavior and begin to focus on some thing that we have control over which is our own lives.
Learning how to have fun in sobriety is probably one of the most important things I’ve had to learn over the last 32 months. I started drinking as a pre-teen at age 12 and as nobody ever intervened I quickly progressed into using every other drug available. My drinking and using continued for 15 years until I got sober at age 27. As you can imagine, every idea that I had of what fun was involved drinking and using.
Based on my experience, when teens begin drinking and using at such a young age, we don’t develop a strong sense of what we like (or like to do). Everything that I did as a teenager (and well into adulthood) involved drinking alcohol and using drugs, so in getting sober, one of the most frightening thoughts (for me) was that I would never have fun again. As it turns out, that thought couldn’t have been farther from the truth.
Thankfully, the drug treatment program that I went through incorporated “mandatory fun” as part of the program. We had to go out with the group every week to learn how to have fun in sobriety…to learn that fun is possible without the use of mind altering substances…and necessary. Not having had any healthy or positive hobbies up to that point, it took some time (and trial and error) for me to learn how to have fun and what things I like to do. Interestingly enough, there were some hobbies that I had developed as a teenager (such as writing and photography) that I still enjoyed, it just became a matter of learning to enjoy them in a sober state. There are many things that I’ve since learned that I like (which I never would have imagined liking before).
Looking back into my active addiction as a teenager, the less I remembered about any given day or night is how I determined the amount of fun I had (the less I remembered, the more fun I must have had….obviously!) My ideas about fun now, in sobriety, are much different. I enjoy being present for each moment. The fun of everything is here in the moment!
When I entered drug rehab I was under the impression that addiction meant addiction to drugs or alcohol, I never could have imagined the way that the disease manifests in our lives.
In studying about the disease concept you learn that the disease of addiction is not about a particular substance, it centers in our thinking. Substances that addicts can fix on can include anything from drugs and alcohol to shopping, exercise, relationships or food, basically anything that an addict uses in order to not feel feelings and not focus on oneself.
Alcoholics Anonymous founded what they described as a “spiritual malady” or a “two fold disease: allergy of the body and obsession of the mind”. This was later coined the disease concept. A disease can be defined as a disordered or incorrectly functioning organ, part, structure, or system of the body resulting from the effect of genetic or developmental errors, infection, poisons, nutritional deficiency or imbalance, toxicity, or unfavorable environmental factors; illness; sickness; ailment. This parallels the conditions of the disease of alcoholism and how it is a BIO-PSYCHO-SOCIAL disease. This means that alcoholism can be caused by heredity/ genetics (BIO), psych make-up (PSYCHO) and the environment is which one is raised (SOCIAL). The disease is treatable, but if not treated it results in jails, institutions and death.
What is addiction? What is its purpose? How am I, as a non-addict qualified to talk about it? These were some of the questions I struggled with when I first started my employment here at Visions Adolescent Treatment Center. I was first hired as a Program Aide almost two years ago. As days and months passed by, I started realizing that addiction not only applies to drug and alcohol addiction but to all areas of life. Addiction in my view, applies to any unhealthy behavior that consumes ones life and leaves the soul ill-equipped to confront its true desire and goals. Is it not that any mental obsession, a psychological compulsion or any physiological or historical disarray that has not been confronted can qualify as an addiction?
It is difficult to comprehend this disease, for there are no true physical evidences that can pinpoint its terrible effects. And yet, everyday I witness the struggle amongst the adolescents that walk through Visions Adolescent Treatment Center. These young adults have, at times spent most of their lives being addicts and not knowing that it is affecting their dreams. For most of them, they have no idea what their dreams are even made of. Upon entering this treatment center, they are faced with answering questions that puts into perspective their unhealthy belief system. This is one of the most heart-breaking and rewarding parts of this job. It is a challenge to watch these kids break down and cry and slowly try to put themselves back together. The only thing one can do is be there for them and guide them through their true self-discovery.
I have now the title of an educator at Visions. This position entails the responsibility of inspiring the residents to include their education as part of that foundation that they are rebuilding. It is difficult at times. Amongst the insurmountable assortments of character defects and psychological behaviors that they are facing, the last thing on their mind seems to be education. And yet, somehow I have to install in them the understanding that obtaining an education is in a way gaining freedom from our own formless and bored mind. Which at times is what steers so many of these young adults into drugs and alcohol. It is not an easy task, although the attempt has been the one thing that has kept me going.
With time passing, within the required stay of 45 days minimum, some residents realize the depths of their addiction; some understand the sadness of letting go of their drug of choice, which to them is their love at the time. There are also the ones that discover the gift of learning who they truly are and how to learn to be ok with who they are.
Working here has allowed me the opportunity to reiterate how I confront challenges in life through love, honesty, patience and forgiveness. It is reminding the kids that we do not know how to live life at times, but what makes it ok not to know is the wisdom we gain from our mistakes, our defeats and our own accomplishments. At last in my understanding, addiction needs not to be only with drugs and alcohol but the distorted mind process that inhabits the crevices of our thought process.
I never thought it would happen to me. I never thought that I’d become a teen addict. In fact, I never saw myself even touching drugs or alcohol. I’d watch my parents drinking and be disgusted by their behavior. I was a straight ‘A’ student, I was on the cross-country team, I played soccer, and I played the piano. In other words, I was your typical sweet and innocent “goody-two-shoes” kind of girl. But, I grew up with the feeling that I never fit in. I always felt as if I was on the outside looking in. So, when I got to high school, I decided that I was going to become “popular” and do whatever I had to do to fit in. At the age of fifteen I was introduced to drugs for the first time. The first time I got high, I felt an utter sense of relief. I finally felt like I fit in; I felt like I was finally ‘a part of’. The drugs made me who I thought I always wanted to be. I could be loud and outgoing, I could dance, and I could be the life of the party. But, things went downhill, and they went downhill fast. By the age of sixteen I was dating a drug dealer and was in lost in this world of drugs. Soon, my life revolved around using. Everything else came second. By senior year, I was missing so much school, that I almost didn’t graduate high school. Two months before graduation, I had gone into a drug-induced psychosis. Not knowing what was wrong with me, my parents took me to the emergency room. The next day, I began an outpatient program. It was at that treatment center where I learned about the disease of addiction, and I was able to admit that I was definitely an addict. But, at that age (I was seventeen at the time), I did not think I was ready to get clean. I had to go back out and use for another couple years before I came back and got sober. But, I am very grateful for what I learned in that teen treatment center, for had I not gone there, I don’t know if I ever would have realized the true extent of my problem. I am twenty-two now and I’ve been sober for almost two years. Since then, my life has changed dramatically. I am able to handle my feelings without having to numb myself with drugs or alcohol. I am able to experience life the way it was meant to be experienced. I feel better about myself than I have ever felt in my entire life. Through being in recovery, I have been able to look at where my negative sense of self originated and have been able to heal from that and begin a new life. Today, I am back to being a good student. I got back into running and am working towards running a marathon. Not only have I picked up my old passions again, but I have also found new hobbies, such as painting, meditation, or hiking. My life today is amazing, and it gets better as each day passes.
Nancy Reagan. My involvement with Visions and my work with teens in their efforts in recovery can all be traced, I believe, to Nancy Reagan.
I was only two years old when the first lady of our nation began championing the “Just Say No” generation into action. There were endless public service announcements and nationwide elementary school campaigns in effort to stop the next wave of drug users from making the same mistakes our parents did. sThere we were, smack dab in the middle of the decade of self-indulgence, signing sobriety pacts years before we would start wearing deodorant.
The first lady’s anti-drug movement was about as effective as all the other trickle-down syndrome policies of the Reagan administration. Fast-forward ten years and those same children were doing the same drugs we were warned about. The ‘Just Say No’ moniker, as much a part of Saturday morning as cartoons and fruit loops, gave the impression that the disease of alcoholism and addiction was a question of will. We were made to believe that fighting this progressive and fatal affliction was so simple. “Would you like onions on your burger?” No thanks. “Would you like to trade self worth and the innocence of childhood for jails, institutions, or death?” No thanks. As we now know, there is a lot more to it than that.
For most people, these questions are that simple, but for people like me and the brilliant young people I have the gift to work with; it takes a complete psychic change as brought forth from working the twelve steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. This is why I do what I do. It is my wish to dispel the myth of willpower as a solution to our disease, and usher a new era of tolerance and understanding in the fight that Nancy lost.
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VISIONS ADOLESCENT TREATMENT CENTERS Personalized programs dedicated to helping youth and their families recover from the destructive effects of substance and other behavior related problems. (866) 889-3665
